Peacetime Warrior
by ezmegaz
Summary: Our favorite depressed teen asks a question and receives a book. Does the old problem have more than one solution?
1. Initial rambling

Ah, hello there. I'm your friendly host, ezmegaz. I'd like to thank all the people who read my previous attempts at writing fiction. I got some positive feedback, which encouraged me to try to write a bigger piece. But not much bigger.

The following fiction got the name "Peacetime Warrior," because I suck at titles. Our favorite depressed teen asks a question and receives a book. Does the old problem have more than one solution?

Please read and review. Thanks!

**Disclaimer**: I don't own NGE or the characters.


	2. The book

"Has anyone ever tried to make peace with them?" Shinji asked quietly, hoping that no one would hear him. He only voiced his opinion because he felt it odd that they were fighting something that supposedly should destroy mankind, yet he had to hear about how it would happen.

He always wondered why peace never was an option. To his knowledge, no one ever tried to devise a method to talk to them. It's as if they were letting fear get the better of them, not even considering the possibility. As if fighting against them was the only imaginable way to deal with the angels!

He remembered how much pain they caused them. The high sync rate he had was causing him to feel everything that the EVA felt. A peaceful solution would help the pilots situation tremendously. He didn't hate them. The angels seemed like stupid critters without much intelligence not worthy of true hatred.

Another thing he noticed was what he came to call the Sorting Algorithm of Angel Strength. The initial angels where nowhere as strong as the current ones. The first angel he fought at first was tough at the time, but even he had to admit that if he had to fight it tomorrow, he could take it easily enough.

'If Asuka had to fight it, the angel would be completely humiliated.' Shinji thought with a small smile.

Yet the angels returned always, each one stronger than the previous, maybe with the exception of the ninth. It wouldn't have had any chance if there wouldn't have been that power outage. Even so, with Asukas plan, they were able to destroy it in a relatively painless fashion. Had the angels a concept of gentlemanly warfare?

Shinji mused how he admired the girl, who was the best EVA pilot in his eyes, even with his slightly better sync rate. Despite Ritsuko's statement, it was not the most important thing. She never was in battle and always looked at the situation in a relatively safe position, detached from the dangers. A clinical perspective is always cleaner.

In her first engagement on Japanese soil Asuka wanted a flashy debut that almost has cost them the battle, but once she was firm in her position of lead pilot (a position she claimed for herself and that none of the other pilots contested), she was able to lead the group in combat. Even Dr. Akagi mentioned her in the post-battle debriefing, congratulating the girl for her quick thinking. That same confidence and competence made Shinji more comfortable in his position.

"What?" Shinji asked as he noticed everyone staring at him.

"You asked something?" Misato asked.

"Never mind." Shinji replied quickly.

"You know, when you say that..."

"...it seems like I'm trying to get attention." Shinji remembered that particular conversation with some shame. He realized that he really did say that to get some attention. "I remember. But it was just something stupid I thought about." This was different, he reminded himself.

"Shinji," Ritsuko turned towards him, "we're fighting a highly unconventional enemy, all information can be useful. Especially from someone with as much field experience as you."

"Yeah, right." Asuka scoffed. "Like the Baka has anything useful to say."

"Quiet!" Ritsuko told Asuka, then faced Shinji. "Out with it!"

With staying quiet no longer an option, Shinji asked again. "Why do we fight them?"

"Are you stupid? They are the enemy. We are soldiers. Even you should understand that much."

"I understand that, but has anyone ever tried to..." Shinji was unsure how to put it. "I don't know, make peace with them?"

Misato listened to the boy and reached the conclusion that he was trying to get out of piloting without actually running away. 'Teenagers,' she thought, 'always with the angst.' But she guessed it's understandable with Shinji, he never wanted to fight in the first place. While he was performing well considering his limited training, he didn't have a soldiers heart, like Rei or a warriors like Asuka.

"Shinji," she tried to explain, but Shinji thought her tone was a tad more condescending than Ritsuko's, which was a record in itself, "they are coming to destroy the world. If they ever would succeed, everyone you care about would die."

"How?" Shinji asked.

'Danger, Ritsuko Akagi!' The doctor thought. The boy came dangerously close to asking the right questions. Questions like why they're always attacking Tokyo-3. Fortunately, Askua helped her out.

"Are you really this dense? Haven't you seen them?" The redhead was fuming at the apparent denseness of his fellow pilot. "If I recall correctly, you were almost roasted by one! Another one almost tore your fucking arms off! And you're asking if they're really the enemy?"

"I know they are the enemy! But it seems that they are only capable of destroying maybe a city. Tragic, but not in an Earth shattering way you make it seem like." While Shinji knew he was losing the argument, he felt the need to defend his position. "I-I don't mean that it's not a problem..." He shut up as he realized that he said something incredibly stupid.

Misato was starting to become annoyed at her charge. He didn't mean anything bad, but the angels were the enemy. They killed half the population of Earth, including her father. She had to take her revenge, but if Shinji does not cooperate, they'll be in much trouble. Shinji was still the most experienced of the pilots, the only one that took part in all angel battles (except the 11th angel, but that was understandable). She didn't want him to question the objectives because of his naivety.

"I understand your position, Shinji," Ritsuko interrupted anything Misato would say, "but we do not have the time to find out if we can communicate. As for why it would end the world: please believe me when I say that you should trust us. Understanding the reason requires understanding the current theories of meta-physics, meta-biology, mathematics..."

"O-okay, I-I get it." Shinji wasn't so sure of himself now. But the seed of doubt has already been planted.

"Finally!" Asuka exclaimed, rolling her eyes as she cursed the idiot of a god that let a dumbkopf like the Third Child be born. "Could we wrap this up before the heat death of the universe?"

* * *

"Akagi-san, you asked to see me?" Ritsuko didn't look up from the terminal she was working on. Since she still couldn't find why the learned fitness function of a genetic algorithm was off she was starting to get a bit miffed. 'It was supposed to be a five minute fix,' she idly thought, forgetting the Third Child patiently waiting at the door, 'but the idiots could never understand how to give a proper estimate.' At the rate she was going, she'll be here all night.

Shinji saw as the doctor apparently forgot him, but in his time at NERV, she has seen the consequences of interrupting the scientist when she was in the zone. Poor Makoto was never going to look at a soldering iron the same way.

After fifteen minutes, Shinji's shoulders slumped as he realized that he was forgotten again.

'I guess I should be used it to by now.' he thought after half an hour. 'People always ignore me.' His current litany of angs was interrupted when the blonde noticed him.

"Shinji! How long have you been waiting?" Ritsuko asked a bit alarmed.

"Not long," he lied.

"I'm sorry, but I was trying to solve a problem with the MAGI. You know how it is."

"Uhmm... not really."

Dr. Akagi looked at the boy with a questioning face. Why was he here? Was it so important that he waited for who knows how long before realizing that she asked him to come see her? Right after a tenuous harmonics test. 'Oh right, now I remember!'

She frowned at her own absent mindedness, hoping that she wouldn't turn into some stereotypical senile scientist. She was almost relieved when she realized that the Commander would see to it that no one would be alive in a year. But at least she already excelled at being a crazy cat lady.

"I can come back later." Shinji said as he mistook the look on her face. 'Maybe I came at the wrong time?'

"No, no, it's good." She walked to the bookshelf in her rather spacious office. The shelf was full of books. Shinji looked, but he couldn't even understand most of the titles. "I just wanted to give you this." She handed him a book.

Ender's Game

by Orson Scott Card

"This might answer your questions about why we cannot communicate with them." The doctor told him. "Just don't try to apply it to the current situation too much. There are similarities, but our situation is a bit different."

"Thank you, Akagi-san." Shinji didn't especially like science fiction, but she was generous enough to consider his question and he wasn't going to be ungrateful.

"I expect you to read it over the weekend." She said. At first, Shinji thought that she was joking, but the serious look on her face deterred him. "On Monday, I expect you to explain what you understood from it, and how you see the differences. Comprende?"

"C-comprende."

"No, Shinji, comprendo. Learn some Spanish." She laughed, a bit too disturbingly for Shinji's liking.

"Bye, Akagi-san." Shinji said, as he inched away from the doctors office. 'Weird woman.'

* * *

After Shinji left the office, Ritsuko was about to continue debugging when her phone rang. The caller ID showed the name of Gendo Ikari. Next to his name was a picture of a black heart.

"How did it go?" He asked without any preamble.

"I gave him the book. He'll be too focused on the communication problem to ask questions about Lilith."

She could practically hear the eyes of the Commander bulging as he processed this bit of information. "Please reassure me that the Third Child didn't say that."

"Of course he didn't. But he was close." She replied, suppressing a groan. "But as you oh-so-perfectly predicted, the others had their own reasons for not caring about the answer."

It was true. Gendo has handpicked all the senior personnel from Fuyutsuki, the bridge technicians and the pilots to consist only of people who wouldn't question the whys or could be trusted with the plan (at least with most of it). For everyone else, a reassuring and friendly 'You don't have the clearance for the answer, so fuck off!' was enough.

Misato never questioned the why and wouldn't care much about the answers. She wanted revenge at all costs and did not care for any justification. Also she was a soldier, they were at war and the enemy was at the gate. They had to be destroyed.

Asuka didn't particularly care about anything other than piloting the EVA. For all she cared the angels could come for the fine cuisine of Japan. As long as her position as the top pilot was not questioned, everything was okay. Even the horrible collateral damage (thousands dead or injured, billions of yen damage, etc.) each battle brought.

And Rei knew the truth but had no reason to see any flaw in the Commanders decisions. In that regard, Asuka was right, the girl really was a doll. Ritsuko didn't like the First Child, remembering the rumors about her mother pretty well. One of the many reasons she didn't like the blue-haired pilot, but at least she could be depended upon.

This bought her attention to the Third Child. He had the weakest motivation for fighting. Everyone knew – or at least thought they knew – that Shinji only piloted to gain the approval of his estranged father. If he ever found out about any of NERV's dirty little secrets, he would run for the hills. She'd rather have him as he's now, braver and more confident than he has been a few months ago. He certainly didn't need to know anything. That is why ultimately he was kept more in the dark than anyone else at NERV.

For Gendo, Shinji's questions have been only a slight problem. The Third Child probably wouldn't have the galls to spill the beans, but if Katsuragi would ask the same questions they'd be in deep trouble. Section-2 agents and SEELE spies could easily disappear, but the death or disappearance of a UN Army officer like her would bring too much undue attention. Better to deter the boy through such a simple gesture. He's probably grateful for the extra attention.

"Yui liked that book" Gendo brought her back from her musings.

'Oh, boy' she groaned. 'This will take a while.'

"You know, back in 1999..." Ritsuko already put the phone on speaker and set it down on bookshelf next to her desk, so she could react to Gendo if needed but he wouldn't hear her typing.

'Now, from where did that feedback loop get its parameters?'

To be continued ...

* * *

And now for an omake,

"No, no, it's good." She walked to the bookshelf in her rather spacious office. The shelf was full of books. Shinji looked, but he couldn't even understand most of the titles. "I just wanted to give you this." She handed him a book.

Kama Sutra

"Make sure you study it in depth, Shin-chan." Ritsuko said, licking her lips.

'Not again!' Shinji swallowed hard.


	3. The answer

"What are you reading, Baka?" Asuka asked him absently as she sat down on the couch, next to the reading Third Child. Shinji didn't answer but turned the book so Asuka could see the title.

"That one? I've read it ages ago. You see, I really could identify with Petra, until I saw how she buckled under pressure! I can get through anything I want! Unlike you, sissy-boy."

"I thought Ender would be your ideal," Shinji said, ignoring the jab at him. It would be pointless arguing with Asuka about anything regarding her intelligence, skills, beauty, etc. 'Or mine' he thought absently. "With him being a hyper-competent hero everyone has high hopes for."

"Nah, I don't get why he's been so upset about killing the buggers." She said, not noticing that she had an actual civil conversation with her roommate. "They deserved what they got and besides, payback is a bitch. Ender just got all whiny for doing his job."

"Yes, but he was that way because he finally understood how they were thinking. Could we not do the same? I mean understanding the angels, why they attack... what their weaknesses are?" He added, trying to sound like a proper soldier so the redhead wouldn't accuse him being a coward. Again.

"Who cares as long as I have my EVA?" She asked in her 'I'm better than you' tone.

'Yeah, right. Without all three EVA's we could not have defeated the tenth angel, yet you make it sound like you did all the work.' he thought but refrained from voicing his misgivings. 'Damn it, my arms still hurt.' He rubbed his arms remembering what it felt like to catch the 30 metric tons of falling angel in the EVA's hands.

"Oooh, look," she said as she noticed something in the soap they were watching, "that guy looks like Kaji. A bit less manly, but..."

Shinji simply tuned out the rambling of the lovestruck girl as he read his book. There were many interesting points. The angels didn't seem to have any method for communicating with them and so they couldn't ask mankind why they were trying to stop them. Ultimately, they were in a similar situation with humans as humans where with them.

But even so, unlike the buggers, who never wanted to do a third invasion and did the previous ones out an honest mistake, the angels did want to start Third Impact. That was the main difference, he decided. What good it is to understand them, if they still have goals that would kill all humans?

"...don't you think so?" Asuka asked. Shinji was suddenly aware that the redhead expected an answer from him.

"You're right, I guess." A safe answer that would guarantee that he wouldn't be abused anymore.

"So you think that Rei's a stupid and ugly doll?" Or not.

"What?"

"You said I'm right. Or were you not listening and just answered so I would not notice you ignored me?"

"Uhhh..."

"Smart answer, Baka, it really suits you." she said staring at his fellow pilot with a frown.

* * *

"Did you read it?"

"Yes. Twice."

"So? What do you think?"

"I think I got the most of it. The angels and the buggers are similar because we cannot communicate with them. They're also different, because the buggers didn't want to invade, but the angels want Third Impact." It sounded a bit rehearsed to Shinji because he wasn't completely convinced about that last part. But in the end he had to concede that the angels really did attack and they did a lot of damage. Besides, Dr. Akagi told him to trust NERV. 'Then why do I doubt you so much?' he asked the blonde doctor in his mind.

"That's correct. Even if we could communicate with them, it would be guaranteed that they'd have goals conflicting with ours. And we only want to survive." Shinji wondered if NERV and the IF had the same justification and rationalization. That the buggers attacked first therefore they want to continue the invasion for their own alien reasons.

"So it would be pointless?" Clearly Dr. Akagi wasn't thinking along the same lines as he was. Trying to understand people has never been easy for him, but he understood that the scientist didn't think that there would be any practical means for communication devised during the war. And even if they had a way to talk, would anyone be willing to communicate with them and trust the angels to not destroy the world? Especially after Second Impact?

"Maybe, maybe not." She answered him, mainly to end his line of question. "But there is also a personal message for you too."

"What? Like a note for me in it?"

Ritsuko laughed a bit at his misunderstanding. "No, I meant the situation the protagonist was in. Do you recognize it?"

"Not really." Shinji said. The teens self-worth was too low to even consider the analogies between Ender and himself.

"You face a similar situation. Everyone expects you to be a soldier and fight for mankind, yet you are still a kid. You should be at home, getting ready for high-school and college eventually, not taking on such a burden."

Shinji didn't think he had much to look forward in his life. Effectively being an orphan he did not have the same options as those around him. He thought that such things as a family would be for other people. He couldn't imagine what it was to be loved unconditionally. This saddened the young man a lot.

"But such is the world." Ritsuko continued. "You have to grow up fast, otherwise we're all screwed. It might be harsh, but you three pilots are our only hopes. Do you understand?"

"I think so."

"So, did you like it?"

"Yes, it was very interesting. Thank you." He bowed to the doctor and then stepped in front of her desk to hand the book back.

"Keep it." She said and smiled at the boy. "You might get more out of it. Re-read it a bit later, when you've thought about the themes more."

"T-thank you, but I don't want to impose..."

"Nonsense! I've read it a million times, I could recite the whole thing for you."

"What was the message for you?"

"Believe it or not, I faced a similar situation. My mother wanted me to eventually continue her work, so I was learning how to solve differential equations before I even went to school. She never asked me if I wanted to. But I was lucky, because it just happened to be my true calling. You could say I do this because I can."

The thought of doing something just for it's own sake was an alien feeling to the boy, so he nodded, and went on his way.

* * *

Tuesday morning found Shinji walking to school alone. Asuka said she had to take care of something and left before the boy. He felt alone walking by himself without the redhead. During the months she had arrived the morning walk together was becoming a tradition between the two, which the boy secretly liked very much.

The book, a present from a person he didn't think liked him enough to give one was in his backpack. He liked the book and the characters. He had to admit that he admired Ender a lot. Unlike him, the super-genius boy faced the challenges until the very end with confidence and skills he lacked.

He just wanted this war to end and maybe ask Misato if she would keep him. 'God, it's like I'm her pet.' He couldn't imagine why she would want to keep him around otherwise. There would be no more reason for it. But he didn't really want to go back to Sendai to his teacher. The old man was never cruel or callous, but he barely gave him any thought.

"Heya, Shin-man!" Touji, his friend greeted him, making Shinji realize that maybe he didn't have it so bad. He was sure that the boy hung out with him because he was still feeling guilty about attacking the pilot for a misunderstanding. And Kensuke really just wanted the latest info and gossip about the enigmatic giant robots. But he was grateful for that they were at least trying. "Why so depressed?"

"Yeah, you should be proud, you're a Pilot. Man, I wish I was chosen. Sure you cannot help?" Kensuke began his usual tirade he gave every time they met before the school. It had become a routine occurrence between the two boys. Shinji would just mumble something in reply about not having any influence.

"Leave him alone, ya damn geek." Touji said, much to the appreciation of his other friend. "So, how's Misato? I cannot believe that ya got to live with such a gorgeous babe." 'Ah, so that's why he stood up for me!' Shinji thought wryly.

"Well, uhmm..." He wasn't sure how to answer.

"Mister Hotshot doesn't care because he already has Ayanami. Bet you're getting very chummy with the Ice Queen of Tokyo-3, ya sly dog!" Touji liked teasing his friend who he was sure had a thing for the blue-haired enigma. "Why are ya looking at me like that?"

"Ikari-kun." The aforementioned girl greeted them stepping forward from behind Touji.

"H-hi, Ayanami-san." Shinji replied to the greeting.

The jock was about to defend himself before he would get hit, but Rei simply continued to walk without further acknowledgement of the boys. 'Man, creepy.' The jock thought. 'And she only greets him, but he doesn't see it?'

When the girl left, Shinji continued where they've left off "It's not like that. I barely know her." That wasn't really true, but he didn't want to tell them about the tender moment they shared when they defeated the fifth angel. Or just how much he cherished it.

"You got further with her than anyone else." Kensuke said mildly irritated.

While he was over it, a few weeks before Shinji got to Tokyo-3 he tried to ask the girl out. She only looked at him, without saying anything then looked away. Laughter soon erupted from the class. Later one of his classmates explained that all boys trying to ask her out got the same treatment from the Ice Queen of Tokyo-3 so he shouldn't take it personally. And before he could ask an obvious question, he said that the one girl who did the same wasn't treated any better.

"Well, I work with her."

"Ah, leave 'im be, Shinji's dense when it comes to girls."

Shinji felt a bit annoyed at the assumption. While he liked his friends sometimes he wondered if they understood anything about him. Feeling a bit more confident, he asked Touji, "So I take it you finally noticed the girl who likes you." He didn't have to be much observant to notice Hikari's infatuation with the boy.

"What?" Touji was looking around, curiously missing a certain brunette. "Where?"

"You cannot figure it out for yourself, Mister Suave?" Kensuke asked, reaching the conclusion Shinji had a lot earlier. Early as in sixth grade.

"Don't tell me it's the Devil. I mean she's got a killer body, but come on. Her personality could make milk go sour." Touji failed to miss the look on his friends face that mirrored the look they had a few minutes ago.

"Is that so?"

Shinji and Kensuke, long-time recipients for the redheads ire (for different reasons) started to implement the proper response for situations like this and bravely ran away. They could hear Asuka scream at the cowering jock, but he deserved it, being so careless twice a day.

"Uhmm... Kensuke?"

"Yes?"

"He really did deserve that, didn't he?"

"Yes. Now let's hurry or she'll notice us." Kensuke said even if he had a hard time keeping up with Shinji's pace.

* * *

Class went by and Shinji continued to wonder about communication. The problem with the angels was getting his attention more and more. He liked the mystery, at least from a theoretical perspective. Fighting them on a regular basis wasn't as fun as Kensuke imagined, but the problem itself was interesting.

'How differently do they think from us?' He thought. 'Ritsuko said that they are similar in a lot of things, but that doesn't mean anything. I can barely understand pre-Impact culture even if the people then were almost exactly the same as people are now. Even understanding my friends is pretty hard.'

The elderly teacher continued to drone on about how Impact changed the world. It was barely coherent, he wondered what anyone could learn from him. At first Shinji was amazed that anyone would let such a broken and senile old man teach, but later he found out that he had to be recalled from retirement. A lot of the teachers went away when the shooting started.

But lately he started to understand that the Impact, the following wars and the culture shock of the changes in the last fifteen years left the man in a sorry state. He didn't have a family anymore, his loved ones dying during the Impact Wars. And now he had to teach again. The principal has guilt-tripped him into coming back, citing reasons such as honor and duty. Shinji felt sorry for old man and tried his best to show respect for the old man so many others forgot. Unbeknown to Shinji, the old man liked the young boy for that.

Eventually the lecture ended, but the boy was so preoccupied with his musings that he didn't notice the bells that signaled the end of the school day. His reverie was broken by Kensuke slapping him in the back making him jump in surprise.

"Hey, do you want to hang out? Maybe go to the arcade?" The otaku asked.

"I can't. I have to go home and make dinner for Asuka and Misato. Then I have to clean the apartment."

"Man, Asuka was right. You are housebroken."

"So?" He didn't get why it was such a big deal. He actually liked housework, made him feel useful when not fighting angels. And he knew that he'd drown in filth if the two beautiful slobs were tasked with cleaning. And it was better not to think about Misato's cooking. He was about to ask Dr. Akagi if they could use it against the angels, but she'd probably tell him that it would be too cruel.

"I mean an EVA pilot shouldn't do such menial jobs. Isn't that what Asuka used to say?"

"I don't mind. I actually like cooking and working with my hands." Shinji stated, looking the other boy in the eyes. "Gives me time to clear my head. Besides, both of them are a lot nicer after a good meal, and I have a lot to thank for Misato."

"If you say so."

"I do. Hmm... Kensuke, can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

"Do you know the book Ender's Game?"

"Yeah." The bespectacled boy said. "It's one of my favorites. I mean, how cool it would be to have a school where you'd be trained to become a General of a big war, being the sole hope for survival." Kensuke then remembered who he was speaking to. "But you are already that way, aren't you?"

"Not really. I'm not a super-genius, nor a General and Asuka would kill you if she heard you say 'sole hope.' Besides I'm just a Second Lieutenant in name only." Shinji said, not really liking where Kensuke was heading. The boy had a penchant to change the topic so it would be about the EVAs. His last statement made his friends eyes go wider, making Shinji realize why he never mentioned that last bit of information before.

"WOW! You are a Lieutenant? They commissioned you?" The boy asked, drawing a lot more attention and making a few people turn their way. While none of them where as enthusiastic as Kensuke Aida was, they found the fact that three of their classmates were EVA pilots and officers of NERV interesting.

While the German exchange student was more than happy to talk about herself, the other two pilots, Ikari and Ayanami were hard to get to know. Aside from Aida, Suzuhara and the other pilots, the boy had no other friends. While a lot of girls and a few boys were interested in him, after realizing just how little confidence he had and how little he interacted, his celebrity status slowly faded away. For a hero he was boring.

"IN NAME ONLY!" Shinji was cursing himself for revealing his 'rank.' If they knew how much he made as a pilot, not including hazard pay they'd never leave him alone. Of course, 75 percent of that payment went into an account that he would gain access to after he turned 18. The old man made sure he didn't squander away his good fortune. But even so, the quarter of the pay he was getting was pretty substantial. Especially for someone not used to having a disposable income.

"Leave him alone, Kensuke." An irate Hikari told the boy. Asuka made it clear that most things about NERV are top-secret but Shinji would reveal them if 'interrogated' long enough. So in a somewhat uncharacteristic move she asked the always prim and proper class representative to help Shinji out in such situations.

She was happy to oblige. While she didn't like Shinji the same way as she liked Touji, the boy was polite and soft spoken, which got some mild attention from the young class representative. 'And he's cute too' she thought. 'Too bad he had been broken in by Asuka and the Major.'

* * *

Major Katsuragi, officer of the UN Provisional Army, 22nd Infantry Division, tactical genius and overall unconventional thinker moaned in delight thanks to a certain young boy. After living on instant meals for who knows how long the homemade meals of her ward felt like heaven. She was so distracted that she didn't notice the two teenagers looking at her with a shared smile.

"What?" She asked, when she finally noticed.

"Someone is in a good mood." said Asuka.

'My Ikari-senses are tingling!' Shinji, with a flash of insight realized that the teasing scheduled for today was about to begin in 3... 2... 1...

"Well," Misato replied, "you have to admit, the food was delightful. Plus, he does look kind of cute in that apron."

The aforementioned apron was pink and had 'Kiss the cook' written on it in English. It was Misato's present after he defeated the fifth angel. While he didn't like pink and the fact that the 'i' was dotted with a cute heart made his masculinity recede further he liked the sentiment. That didn't mean the two women weren't going to tease him.

"Give him a spine and make him look a bit more like Kaji and he'd be the perfect boyfriend." Asuka replied. Shinji just rolled his eyes at that statement, but said nothing. The redhead was in good mood, she barely insulted him. He had to admit that after Asuka had eaten, she was much nicer. And she also kind of complimented him.

"Better snatch him now while he's free, or someone'll beat you to the punch." Misato said with a smile, making both teens blush. "Maybe it'll be me when he gets a little older."

"W-why would I want the Baka?" Asuka shouted. "He's just a damn perv! I bet he'd just love to violate my young and innocent body!"

'So much for peace. Gee, thanks Misato!' He was sure she didn't mean to upset anyone but she destroyed the status quo he was enjoying so much.

"Oh, don't be in such a denial." Misato wagged her fingers at Asuka with a teasing smile. "The lady does protest too much."

"Gah! And you're supposed to be our guardian?" Asuka was ready to turn the table on Misato, which was Shinji's cue to escape. He inched away from the potential disaster, and went into his room. He heard Asuka continue her attack. "I bet Shinji is secretly your guardian. You don't seem to do much around here."

"Hey! You're no better, you mooch! When did you..." Shinji managed to pull his headphones on after deciding that today he required something loud. Classical music wouldn't do much to tune the argument out, but metal was.

* * *

**A/N**: So, what did you think? Next chapter the plot will move ahead, I promise. I was going to publish new chapters each Sunday around midnight (CET) but I already have some buffer so I decided to put it out there now. The next update will probably come somewhere on the weekend.

This is my first real attempt at writing a longer story (I always liked short, to the point stories) with plot and characterization so any constructive criticism would be much welcome. Oh, and I realized how much I like writing Omake's. It's the perfect place to dump some silly things or parts of the story that were cut because it didn't fit but was too good to give up.

Cheers!

* * *

Omake

"Shinji," Misato said as they stood before the purple giant. "You're our only hope. No one else can do it."

"O-okay. I-I'll do i-it!" The boy was nearly crying.

"You must defeat the angel... with this banana."

"WHAT?" Shinji cried out, almost jumping off from his bed.

"Shut up!" He heard a shrill voice. "I'm trying to get my beauty sleep."

"Sorry."


	4. Return from the friendly abyss

Shinji sat on a seat in what looked like a train car. He didn't know how he got here, seeing as the last clear thing he remembered was the shadow of the angel swallowing him. After that, everything was murky. He remembered the fear, the sight of the LCL going bad, the knowledge that he's going to die alone in the void. He remembered as he started to feel his eyes getting heavier as he started to run out of oxygen.

He wasn't alone. The car held eight people.

A girl in a black dress, smiling at him.

A gray-skinned, sickly looking man looking empty-eyed.

A big, burly man in leather armor who looked like an ancient warrior.

A blonde, twenty-something beautiful woman. Anyone looking at her carefully would notice the predatory gleam in her eyes.

A pregnant woman, sitting on one of the seats opposite of him with a content smile on her face.

A boy with silver white hair and red eyes, wearing a white shirt and black slacks, not unlike Shinji himself.

And a familiar, brown haired and green eyed woman, smiling at him. He felt warmth coming from the woman, like the rays of the sun after a long winter.

"Who are you?" Shinji asked, still dizzy from the lack of oxygen he experienced moments ago. He realized this dream. He had many like this, but in those dreams, there was only one other passenger. Sometimes it was his old teacher or his father, but most of the time it was a younger version of himself.

"He's awake." He heard the figures whisper among themselves.

"Hello, Shin-chan." The brown haired woman said, with a drop of tear at her eyes. "I'm so happy to see you."

"Who are you?"

"You don't remember me?"

"M-mo-mother?" Shinji was crying tears of joy as recognition hit him. He never dreamed about her mother, not even after her death. He didn't even remember what she looked like much. "I missed you so much."

"I know, sweetie. I'm here now." Yui Ikari walked over to her son and hugged him first time after a decade.

"I thought you died."

"In a way I did. It's complicated. But I am here now. Thanks to the angels." Yui Ikari said, motioning to the figures.

"Angels?"

"They arranged this meeting."

"Why?"

"To learn. To understand. We don't desire your death." The white haired boy told. "We only desire completion. The means are immaterial. Peace just became an option."

"You want peace?" Shinji was feeling a little hope. Maybe he was right, the angels didn't want to kill anyone. Deep inside, despite Ritsuko's words, he hoped that peace would be an option.

"They didn't know we were sentient. They thought that we were animals on this world." Yui told him.

"Why now?"

"The time was right. You were ready." The pregnant women said.

"They saw you and felt that you wanted peace." Yui elaborated. "I saw the seed of doubt in you. So when you were about to die, I could free myself and call out to them.

"They are a lot like us. They don't want any more of theirs to die. But remember that they are also different."

"What do they want?"

"The Mother. The Father. Then go home." The warrior told him.

"I'll explain later in detail, Shin-chan. For now, answer one question. Do you really want peace?"

"YES, for crying out loud!" Shinji practically shouted.

"Good. He is honest." The others watching mother and son chorused in a whisper.

"Can we trust them, mother?" Shinji asked, a bit calmer. He knew Ritsuko's warnings. They may say they want peace, but it it could be just a ploy.

"Not without reservations." She sighed. "But this is a prisoners dilemma. Only trust can solve the problem."

"What will happen?"

"Show him." Yui told the blonde woman, smiling. She turned to the young boy.

Shinji clutched his head as images began to attack his mind. Touji lying on a bed, crippled. Tokyo-3 leveled to the ground, the broken buildings like broken teeth of a dead giant. Asuka lying in the entry plug, mangled, grasping for the sun. Misato blowing up herself as the soldiers were raising their guns to fire. Ritsuko in a pool of LCL, with a gunshot wound. Gendo Ikari clutching the stump where his hand was. Shinji choking Asuka in a ruined world after the end.

"Aaahh, make it stop! Make it stop!"

The images stopped suddenly.

"What was that?"

"The future. Or one possible future." Yui told him. "We are at a crossroad. What you choose will affect the future in a very direct manner. Shin-chan, it is very rare when the decision of a person can make the world a better place."

Another set of images went through Shinji's head. Misato smiling, in a wedding dress next to Kaji. His father smiling at him. Asuka, Rei, and their other classmates with a happy look on their faces. Touji, helping Kensuke put a tie on. Ristuko laughing at a joke.

"Another possible world. Do you want to see more?"

"No. Let's try it." He said with more determination.

"It is not so easy," the white haired boy told him as he approached. "There is still a question what you are willing to give and do for peace. But you will not be alone, Shinji, I promise you that."

* * *

The mood in the temporary operations center was far from good. It was more than twenty hours since Shinji fell into the inky black void that was the true body of the angel. Things were not looking good. Misato was out for blood and Ritsuko was the closest target. After some... unfortunate words, she slapped her. Rei was refusing to leave the EVA bays, citing readiness as her reason. Asuka still fumed about the idiot getting caught, but she stayed near her EVA too.

But the time was almost up. They had to drop the N2 mines. Ristuko – despite the appearances – was worried about the boy. He saved them many times and she was grateful, but could not properly express it to the boy. And to Misato. But she had to stay a realist. There wasn't much chance that he'd make it out in one piece this time.

Her train of thought was interrupted by a sound that was like pudding hitting concrete. The big, purple mecha was flying through the air in a big parabolic arc. It's limbs were flailing madly, as if trying to right itself. After a few seconds of flight the purple EVA landed head-first in the city center. Everyone was so occupied with the parabolic death-dive that they didn't notice that the angel shrunk and disappeared.

"Pilot life signs stable. He's conscious. Remaining battery time 4:49 on full mode!" Maya Ibuki said, not believing her eyes. "What does this mean?"

"I don't know," Dr. Akagi said. "Send a recovery team for the pilot and the EVA." She was putting the pilot at first to not aggravate the Major further.

On the Command deck, Gendo Ikari sat with Fuyutsuki behind him. Unlike most times, the Commander did not have his customary, trademarked pose. He looked at the screens with unbelieving eyes.

"This was definitely not predicted in the Scrolls."

Fuyutsuki groaned and rubbed his eyes, trying not to say that he's too old for this shit. "The scrolls are not definitive. They are more of a guide."

"We'll have to tread carefully, sensei."

"I hope your plans weren't too static." The elderly former professor said. He never was too fond of the scenario Gendo Ikari lay out, but he had his own want to reunite with Yui. While his relationship with her has always been platonic, he did love her.

"The scenario is unchanged." The younger man said, with only a hint of doubt in his voice.

* * *

'Familiar ceiling.' Shinji laid on the uncomfortable hospital bed. Even if he was conscious during his recovery he had to stay for observation overnight. He did his best to get a little sleep but spending more than a day in nothingness with nothing better to do than sleep he didn't really feel tired. He closed his eyes and did his best to fall asleep.

A few hours later, after some fitful time hovering at the edge of awareness and sleep he heard two sets of footsteps that stopped when they were near. He kept his eyes shut, wanting to know why they came to the room without revealing himself to be awake.

"He was conscious." Misato asked. "Is this really necessary?"

"For the last time, yes!" Ritsuko was understandably annoyed, since the Major has already asked this question a few dozen times. "We need to know if he was harmed by the angel."

"He doesn't even have a scratch," the purple-haired woman told her friend, in a tone more suitable for explaining quantum mechanics to a toddler, "he almost came out better than before!"

"I'm not talking about physical harm but psychological." The doctor explained. "He was in contact with an angel for more than twenty hours. We don't know what happened! Now shut up and let me do my assessment!"

"If you think he's contaminated, why didn't you do a neural scan?"

'Where did that come from?' Shinji thought, but then remembered that the empty-headed facade of Misato was far from the truth. She's the main military tactician in this war and was far sharper than she let go.

Ritsuko's thoughts mirrored that of the young boy. While the Major didn't know about the particulars of detecting contamination, she has been around long enough to hear about the meta-biological theories involved in anything that has to do with the EVA's. Or the layman version of them, anyway.

"We don't need it. The EVA records the psychograph through the A-10 interface of the pilot from the moment we start the activation process."

'Fuck,' Shinji thought, 'not good.'

Ritsuko continued. "Maya already ran a preliminary analysis on the MAGI. There are no signs that anything happened, but we have to wait a day for the full report. But I'm not worried and you shouldn't be either. This is merely a precaution. Now, go away, I have work to do!" Misato growled, but left.

"I know you're awake, Shinji."

"Sorry," he said, "I just wanted to listen in undetected. People rarely tell me the complete truth face-to-face." He offered a sheepish smile to the woman.

* * *

Asuka was pacing around in her room. That idiot of her roommate was coming home today and she didn't know what to do. Should she hit him for falling into the angel? Or should she show her relief? While she was worried about him, she would never admit that to anyone. She has realized long since the kind of love-hate relationship she had with the male pilot.

She really needed the challenge, and Wondergirl was no good. While she might had been as skilled as Asuka in hand-to-hand combat and had a similarly long training, her dismal sync score meant she could never use Unit-00 to it's full potential.

But Shinji, the boy who was conscripted (or shanghaied) into becoming a pilot was catching up quickly. While his combat skills were less than impressive at the beginning and had a low sync ratio, he was coming up quickly. She liked fighting him in the simulators because even if he was nearly not as good as her, he could still prove to be an amusing challenge.

"Tadaima," she heard Shinji call out. Before she could go greet her roommate and tell him how stupid he acted, she heard Misato beating her to the punch.

"We need to talk, Shinji. Especially about why we follow orders and don't go out guns blazing and attacking enemies with unknown capabilities!" Misato said in a lecturing tone, without any hint of anger. The redhead liked this duality in the woman, at home she might tease her about a lot of things, but during combat she was collected and competent. "Do I need to repeat the talk I gave you after the fourth angel?"

'Here it comes, the apologizing,' Asuka thought.

"I did what I thought I needed to do," the boy replied, "if I had waited, we still wouldn't have known what those capabilities were. I took an acceptable risk."

"That's not the point!" Misato replied, her tone rising a notch. "That is not your call. I am the commanding officer, ultimately I am the one who has to bear the responsibility of those actions. Any good soldier understands that."

"Then I guess I'm not a good soldier." Shinji replied nonchalantly.

"Damn it, Shinji!" Misato shouted, but calmed herself quickly. She knew the boy was never going to be the trooper she needs, but pilots were in short supply and she needed to work with him. "Promise me that you won't do something so reckless next time! Right now, on your mothers grave!"

'That's a bit dramatic,' Asuka thought, but agreed. She was pissed at the boy, she didn't want someone with that mentality watching her back.

"Okay. I, Shinji Ikari, promise on my mother's empty grave that I will follow your orders to the letter and intent during combat." Shinji said, his right hand over his heart. You could barely hear the mocking in his voice.

Misato must have missed it, unlike Asuka, because she just nodded. As the Major noticed the redheaded pilot walking out the room she switched from the no-nonsense Major into the lovable ditz they loved so much.

"Besides, if you had died, Asuka would miss her love monkey." She said with a lecherous grin.

"WHAT?" The redhead was now angry. "Why would I care about the Baka?"

Shinji just rolled his eyes and started to inch back to his room, just to be grabbed by the redhead.

"And where do you think you're going?"

"Narnia?" Shinji replied, not liking where this is going.

"What?" It seems the redhead was not familiar with the works of C. S. Lewis. "Anyhow, you still haven't cooked in the last few days!"

"I have been... indisposed." He replied.

"That's immaterial. Now get to work!"

"Aye, ma'am." Shinji mock-saluted the young girl.

* * *

**A/N**: This is the point where the story is going to diverge. To be honest, the original version of this chapter was going to be very different than I intended. But that story was just not going to work. Not that this has no potential pitfalls. Because of this, my 'forward material' is not so strong. So the schedule of a chapter per week is going to stay.

* * *

Omake

Misato watched in horror as the boy leveled Tokyo-3 after stumbling with an N2 launcher. While he did improve in the last months and in combat displayed a nervous and accidental competence, in the simulation he was often distracted. Discipline with the Third Child has always been a problem, but this was beyond pale.

"Okay, Mr. Oppenheimer, you can come out of the plug." She said with a sigh.

Shinji stepped out of the simulation plug. After he expelled the LCL from his lungs he was cautiously approaching Misato, who was now standing on the catwalk before him.

"What the hell was that about?" Misato asked him.

"Sorry," he said sheepishly. "But in my defense, who the hell builds a nuclear launcher with an auto-fire option?"

"Shinji, you know damn well." Misato replied. "We need more dakka!"

"Never enuff dakka!" Rei chimed in.

"WAAAAGH!" Asuka shouted from her plug.


	5. Alecta iacta est

_Dear __Ikari-san__,_

_Please come to the Municipal Park of Tokyo-3 __on Sunday. You will find instructions on __evading any observers on __the memory card. __This is the day we must make our first step towards our common goal._

_Your friend._

Shinji expected the letter to come sooner or later, but didn't know who this friend was, but he had an idea. Ever since he came back he had to deal with his changes.

For some, he had been grateful. He didn't get anxious anymore, he could stand being around his father without succumbing to fear and panic (it was still hard). And losing the 'Stress induced stutter,' as Misato used to say was a definitive plus. Not being ridiculed by Asuka all the time, since he grew a spine according to her was also welcome. Of course, the girl was convinced that it was her positive influence that bought him a bit of confidence.

'You are an EVA pilot,' she said, 'and live with the gorgeous Great Asuka Langley Soryu. You should hold up your chin!'

On the other hand, there were the nightmares. At first, they were hazy images that disturbed him after he woke up, but he could forget them soon enough. Then they started to intensify.

_Shinji stood on a barren mountain ridge, looking down in the plains beneath. There was the fifth angel, Ramiel, as the Lillum called him madly firing at something in the distance. Next to him stood a big, crystalline and birdlike angel, Arael, firing some kind of energy weapon. But hers (he knew that Arael was a 'her') wasn't focused and intense, but wide and weak looking. But looks could be deceiving._

_Soon he saw their enemy. They stood taller than even Ramiel, slowly walking towards him. He saw that one angel was already defeated. He knew that one, too. Iblis was one of the uglier looking angels, an odd combination of a turtle and a toad. Its broken body lay motionless, and Shinji couldn't help but feel saddened by its demise._

_Even he, who received a lot of pain from these creatures felt moved by the despair Ramiel and Arael showed. The two weapons were obviously ineffective. The giants were coming closer. Now he could make out their features. They stood like the mockery of the human and angelic form, ugly beyond reason from both Lillum and angelic point of view._

_Just when the battle seemed lost, something changed. A giant of light came forth from what looked like a giant black hole and started to attack the Enemy. Another one came forth, immediately joining the previous one. Adam and Lilith, fighting together to save their children._

"_Do you understand?" someone asked quietly. Shinji turned to see a featureless, shining, white and vaguely human looking being. "We cannot stand them being prisoned."_

"_What is this battle?" He already started to feel that he's going to wake up. "I feel weak."_

"_Don't worry. We will meet again." With that, everything went white._

He had meet this apparition several times in his dream. He slowly found out that the angels were created as troubleshooters. That was probably the closest name for their role. Wherever their masters sent them, they fought.

But those masters were long gone and the angels could finally retire. But not everything was right. For their own reasons, the Mother and the Father had left them, and found their way to Earth, where they slept for eons. By the time the scouts of the angels found them, they had already been captured.

Understanding, as they say is the price of peace. Despite being disturbed by the images and the sudden flow of the information, he knew that it'd be worth it. 'It better be, or I'll just feel like the biggest traitor.' Shinji had his fears and doubts. But the dice has been cast.

* * *

Kaji Ryouji, Captain of the JSSDF (22nd chairborne rangers), spy extraordinaire and current Special Inspector to NERV was sneaking around, as spies are wont to do. The war has bought a lot of chaos which gave him ample opportunity to find out some of NERV's dirty little secrets, but on the other hand the last six months where peaceful and everyone dropped their guard noticeably. With nothing to do Section-2 relaxed their private secret police act and gave the debonair spy the opportunities he needed.

Currently he was doing a wireless dead drop. A few months ago, after bribing some contractor he managed to connect a small computer to the main cable going through the walls of some newly rebuilt headquarters of some small delivery company. After it had been installed, the contractor walled the running machine in.

With the wireless network the machine created, he could log in from the nearby coffee shop. Later his handler would come and download the encrypted data and upload the new instructions. While this method was hardly fool-proof, it was simple enough to implement, independent of the MAGI- and SEELE-monitored public network and most of all, inconspicuous.

After all, he could be one of the many people trying to write the definitive Book about the Angel Wars, like many of the thrill-seeking self-appointed future Pulitzer-prize winners. And with the angels lying low, the danger was practically non-existent and the lure was even bigger. Even now, he could see at least three different people writing on their machines feverishly.

While he was distracted a young man with a baseball cap and a pair of large, black shades sat down opposite of him. Before Kaji could react, the man began talking.

"Hello, Kaji. Long time no see." The man started, acting like they were longtime friends, "I see you're still writing that book you told me about."

"Well, you know. One has to work on something during the dull months of work." He realized long ago that rolling with the punch in situations like this gave him more time to form a proper plan. Even as he spoke he slowly slid his hands to his weapon. If he got found out, he would disappear after... disposing the young man. "But what brings you here? Last time you were in... where exactly? You never told me."

"You know, Barcelona, Berlin, Brussels. Around, I guess." He said with a distracted look, then suddenly turned to Kaji with a serious look. "I can't stay any longer, as much as I would like to. But I'm still in town this week. Here, let me give you my phone number. Give me a call and we'll hang out. Just like old times."

With that, the man wrote something on a paper, then handed it to him. "I'm glad we met. Don't be a stranger!" He shook hands with the spy, then turned and left.

Kaji just put the piece of paper in his wallet, intending to look over it later. He finished uploading the files, then put his small laptop away. Deciding that lingering around would not be healthy for him, he paid for another coffee, making sure to flirt with the bariste for good measure. But he wanted to get out as soon as possible in case he was targeted or tracked.

During the walk back to his car and the drive back home he was nervously watching out for any potential observers, but found none. That didn't put him to ease, but there was nothing more to do. After arriving home he stepped into his small bedroom and took the paper out. When he unfolded the paper, he noticed the small memory card taped to it. Putting it into his normal, NERV issued computer was not an option, neither was using his 'work' laptop.

Luckily he still had that hand-held machine he got from Asuka for his birthday. After switching the wireless and bluetooth devices off he made a mental note about reinstalling the system from scratch later. 'Paranoia never killed anyone, but the lack of paranoia did.' as his trainer used to say.

The memory card contained about dozens of files in different directories, but a readme document in the root stuck out. Opening it, he read,

_Dear Ryouji-san,_

_Please forgive the forwardness of my agent, but I had to deliver this letter 'personally.' I guess you must have heard of me (I'm quite known in some circles), just as I have heard from you. Sadly, you are also known in certain circles, which is no life insurance in Tokyo-3. The only thing NERV and SELEE hate more than a spy is a spy who has been found out._

_Please, do not worry. You are still useful to them, so they won't move against you. The information you've collected is pretty much Rubeum Allec, if you forgive me for saying so. Half-truths, outright lies and irrelevant information has been made available for you. Using this information is not only futile, but also extremely dangerous._

_But you still have a few friends, in places you'd probably never suspect. These friends would like to help you out and end the rule of SEELE. On this memory card you'll find the real information about your targets. Everything you've wanted all these years, the answers to your questions._

_Your friend,_

_The Emissary_

Kaji ended up rooting through the files astonished. The information here could potentially change everything. It also got him mad, extremely mad. He decided that he had to get this memory card to his handler at all costs. Setting up a direct meeting would be worth it. Besides, he couldn't use his old equipment for further drops.

* * *

'It is time.' Shinji thought. He has just finished packing a laptop-bag with some clothes in it. The bag was not noticeable, since a lot of people were walking around with bags like this.

"Asuka, I'm going out for a bit." The boy said. Before the redhead could react, he slipped out of the apartment. Now all he needed to do is lose his Section-2 detail. Having extensive experience running away and making his observers looking for him (12 hours was his record and he wasn't even trying) he figured he could get to his meeting pretty soon.

He first went to the city's shopping center intended on getting lost in the weekend crowd. He wasn't standing out much since he would have been the perfect image for a Japanese teen were it not for his stormy blue eyes. He slipped into the toilet of a small shop, where he changed his clothes and put the old ones into the bag. After applying some hair gel and putting on a pair of sunglasses he felt like a completely new person. He didn't know how effective it would be, but his... friends said it would be enough.

He went to the Tokyo-3 municipal park. Thanks to the fight with the third angel the park had a small pond in the middle, formerly just the footprint of Unit-01. The city council decided that the abused park would look better if it would be turned into a little pond. They were right, the small pond quickly became a popular spot the to relax at for the citizens.

He sat down at one of the benches, and waited as he was instructed. After ten minutes, a white haired, red eyed boy sat down next to him. For a while they sat there, without talking. Both boys were enjoying the peace of the park.

"The Lillum are truly opportunistic. One would assume that the site of such destruction would serve as a warning for the future, yet it had been turned into a spot for relaxation."

"Please don''t say Lillum. I don't want any attraction." Shinji told him. "Also, what do I call you? Tabris seems hardly appropriate."

"Call me Kaworu. Kaworu Nagisha."

"Kaworu of the seaside. How... appropriate." Shinji sighed. He knew that the angels didn't have much experience dealing with human beings, but they have gained a lot of knowledge from him and his mother.

"And how should I call you? I assume Zophiel would also not be appropriate."

"Just call me Shinji." He replied. "I'm still not at ease with my ang... other name."

"And you are at ease with your new life, I presume?"

"Not really. I still have the nightmares. Alien landscapes, great battles and bloody wars."

"Those are not mere dreams, they are memories of a time where man didn't even walk the Earth. Memories of our ancestors." The boy replied. "Ours is a bloody history, not unlike yours."

"If that is true, how can I trust you?"

"In the past months I had a lot of opportunities to move against you, the Second and the Fourth." He replied and looked at Shinji with a smile. For a moment, Shinji saw a lot of shark-like teeth in Kaworu's mouth, dripping with blood. He gasped as he realized that the odd-looking boy he saw was a mere image, projected to put him at ease. "The First would hardly prove to be a challenge for me and my remaining brethren. So a bit of trust would be appropriate after our demonstration of good will." The image dissipated quickly. Shinji didn't want to think about what the angel could do to him if he was inclined to move.

"Okay, I guess I'll have to have some trust." He sighed. "So, what's next?"

"In the coming months I'll be sent by those traitors of your race to NERV as a backup pilot as their spy. We will make our next move then." Kaworu replied. "They won't trust me. Gendo will already know my status as a spy for them, so I will need your help finding my parents."

"It is still unbelievably dangerous."

Kaworu just smiled. "All worthy solutions to the almighty prisoners dilemma are risky."

* * *

After the talk he had with Tabris, Shinji returned to the shop where he left his clothes. Changing back he wanted to be noticed by his guards. Hopefully they wouldn't suspect that he lost them on purpose. Having a few hastily bought items he hoped they would think he was just out shopping.

While he was walking home he thought about what he heard. The angels had plenty of chances to catch them with their pants down. With no angel attacks for the last half year, the readiness of Tokyo-3 decreased noticeably. People slowly returned to see the City of Angels. Even now he saw dozens of people from outside Japan taking sights. If they ever knew who he was, he wouldn't have a minute of calm.

He was so immersed in his own thoughts, he failed to notice that he reached their apartment. Taking out his keys, he noticed that the door was open. 'Of course, she is still home.' Just like he expected, he saw Asuka sitting on the couch and watching some soap opera.

"Shinji, tomorrow we have a sync test." She said.

"Gee, I didn't even study." He replied in mocked shock.

"Har, har, smart-ass." She said, but she was smiling at him. In all honesty, Asuka liked this Shinji better than the previous one. He seemed to have developed a sarcastic style of humor. Always quick he amused Asuka. And he was much easier to live with when he didn't apologize constantly. "When's dinner?"

"In a moment. Let me take a shower first." He said not waiting for an answer. While their relationship progressed from 'annoyed tolerance' to 'wary friendship' the girl could still be a pain in the ass. She still demanded food from him, like he was some kind of personal cook (which he didn't mind) and he still was on the receiving end of the occasional barb (which he did mind). But all-in-all, things could be a lot worse.

Of course, with his angelic gifts, he could easily synchronize with his EVA at any level he chose. Not that it mattered, he didn't intend to continue this war. But he was in for a rude rant when she saw that.

"_Shinji, concentrate!" Dr. Akagi told him, irritated. "The EVA isn't receiving any signal from you."_

"_Sorry, Akagi-sensei." He said. He completely forgot that he now had to consciously sync with the EVA. So he concentrated hard._

"_Shinji, what are you doing?" The blonde doctor asked him. "Your sync rate jumped to 100 percent. You're one-on-one with the EVA."_

"_WHAT?" A certain irate redhead shouted. "HOW CAN THE IDIOT BE AT 100 PERCENT? It must be an error!" She was at 80 percent and even that took more than a decade of training._

_Thinking quickly Shinji let the EVA go completely. "What? I didn't do anything. I cant feel the EVA." He hated lying but to be one-on-one meant that they'd suspect him. So he jerked his own sync rate up and down. This meant that on the bridge his psychograph would show up as very erratic._

"_Shinji!" Misato shouted. "Are you all right?"_

"_Yes, Misato, but I still cant feel anything."_

"_Sempai, it must be an error. He should be unconscious by now." He heard Maya Ibuki say._

"_Stop the experiment." Gendo Ikari said, concerned about the Evangelion. "Do a complete diagnostic on it."_

_Shinji knew that the EVA's where horribly complex machines. There was always some small error. He hoped that one would be used to explain the abnormal readings. He didn't have any S2 engine, so he wouldn't be picked up as a pattern blue, but better safe than sorry. He hoped he could stabilize somewhat below Asuka._

Of course, after the incident they did find some error with the measuring equipment. After it was fixed, he steadied his rate at 69 percent, just below Asuka's rate, but above Rei's. This meant that the status quo was restored. The pilot of Unit-02, no more feeling her status threatened, became much friendlier.

He exited the bathroom and went immediately to the kitchen. While the Teutonic Tempest of Tokyo-3 was much friendlier she was still forceful. So he decided to make her favorite food: bratwurst and sauerkraut. How she could eat this, Shinji didn't know, but he wanted to keep her complacent. It didn't take much time to finish. He served the already waiting and slightly drooling girl.

For himself he just ate some leftover grilled fish with rice. As they quietly ate, he stole quick glances at the girl. He was amazed how such a lithe girl could have a seemingly infinite appetite. Even though he made her a much bigger feast she was done with it faster than him.

"That was very nice of you, Shinji," She said, smiling. "Thank you." She told him and gave him a small peck on his cheeks. That was something she started doing recently after Shinji did something nice for her, and he enjoyed it very much.

She was warming up to him pretty quickly as a friend. 'Just as I planned!' He thought and had to consciously prevent himself from taking up his fathers trademark pose.

* * *

**A/N**:

dragon shinobi: Thanks. I don't think Shinji knows her mothers part in the creation of the EVA. It's quite possible that Shinji only knows some bullshit, like her mother died in an accident or something. But maybe I remember the show wrong. For the purposes of this story you can assume that Yui didn't want to be absorbed but rather something unexpected happened. Assume that she tried to pilot Unit-01 to prevent Shinji from having to do it. Same for Kyoko.

amitakartok: Köszi!

Loopsey: Thanks. I don't know if I can take any credit, but it seems to me that it's never even questioned if the war has any meaning. No one except SEELE and the top brass of NERV has any proof that they're fighting for mankind's survival. It was really just something everyone assumed to be true because of Second Impact.

Jalen of Silence: Thanks. Despite that it's not so important plot-wise (whatever the hell the plot is :)) I have tried to think it through and have them represent their personality or description.

Sorry for the schedule slip, but my original ideas for this story where shit. There is no other way of saying this. I had to rework almost everything. Add in a lot of work and you have a week long slip. Add in that I bought the Humble Indie Bundle. Hope I won't make a habit of it.

Also please forgive the potential OOC. I never thought that someone who could survive as much as Shinji did (angel #3-#16, the hostile environment of NERV, etc.) without breaking until after the death of Kaworu could really be called weak. A selfish brat at worst, I could understand that, but not weak. And don't forget that he was vaguely but fundamentally changed by his experience with Leliel.

As for Asuka, there is that fan theory that she is an abusive, petty little tyrant that is using Shinji as some slave labor, but honestly, apart from putting him down a lot and a few slaps, there was not much evidence that she was an insufferable terror. She's not a nice person, but she's less malicious and more damaged. Not to mention that most the reason for her hostility was mostly that Shinji annoyed him.

Rei is still at large. Her role in the original at this time was greatly reduced and I wanted to keep it that way. Maybe after writing some more, I'll include her in a bigger role.

Sorry for the long rant.

Cheers!

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OMAKE

(This was taken from a half-formed fic chronicling the days of Gendo Ikari and Rei Ayanami in an AU where Rei is more of a deadpan snarker and Gendo is the straight man of NERV.)

Or how Rei learned not to mess with Eldritch Abominations.

Gendo walked down the corridors of NERV. He was humming a happy tune (Genocide from The Offspring) when he saw her daughter, Rei Ikari walking into a chemistry lab. The brown haired, blue eyed girl had a mischievous gleam in her eyes, the one Gendo learned to mistrust immensely.

Not wanting to interrupt her twelve year old daughter, he centimetered (or inched, for those who do not like SI) closer to the door of the room. He saw Rei take out a few beakers with some strange liquids and a small Petri-dish containing some white substance.

When she started to pour the contents of the beakers onto the same, Gendo realized what he saw. He leaped into the room shouting a big no, but he was late. An explosion later he found himself thrown against the walls of the lab. When he regained consciousness, he saw her daughter... changed. She had blue hair, red eyes and pale skin.

"Rei, would you kindly explain what THE HELL YOU WERE DOING?"

"I was curious..."

"And?"

"In my defense, we have more of Lilith."


End file.
